Fyrir Jón Valdimar.

 

Cavs gerir grín að Hæn e ken - AD

English Tourist In Texas

An English tourist went to Texas, He got off the bus in Fort Worth, and asked, "Where's a good place to eat?" A man said, "Right down the road is a men's club."

The man didn't realize they had a swimming pool, a work-out room, indoor squash, and racquetball. He just walked to the restaurant door and said to the waitress, "Lady, bring me a steak and a coke."

The waitress brought out a mug that was 12 inches in diameter and 1 1/2 feet tall. The man said, "I just wanted a coke, not the whole factory!" She said, "Mister, this is Texas and everything's bigger in Texas."

Soon she came back with his steak, and it hung over all sides of a huge Sizzling platter. He said, "Lady, I just wanted a steak, not the whole cow!" She said, "Mister, this is Texas, and everything's bigger in Texas."

He finally finished his meal and asked the waitress, "Which way to the toilet?" She said, "It's down the hall, third door on the right."

The man absentmindedly turned into the third door on the left and, with one step, fell into the swimming pool. "Help! Help!" he screamed. "Don't flush it!"

Denise Richards' Funbags

Denise Richards' Funbags from Denise Richards

Assholes of the Forest

Guts vs Balls

         
       
Men  should learn the medical distinction between having 
guts and  having  balls. 
        
We've all heard about people having guts or  balls, but do you 
really know the difference between  them?  
       
In an effort to keep  you  informed the definitions are listed 
below: 
       
GUTS - Is arriving home late after a  night out with the 
guys, being met by your wife with a broom, 
and  having the guts to ask: 
         
"Are you still cleaning,  or are you flying somewhere!" 
BALLS - Is coming home  late after a night out with the 
guys, 

smelling of perfume and  beer,
lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the butt and having
the balls to say: 
       
"You're next, Chubby."    
         
I  hope this clears up any confusion on the  definitions.  
      
Medically speaking there  is no difference in the outcome.

Both

result in  death.

 

Henson´s 11

13 ára byrjaði Seth Rogen með uppistand

Voodoo Clinton

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